Dying? Not Me! Why You Should Plan for Transition
Remember the Eulogy projects we had to write back in High School? Death is a tough subject to broach, and many would rather deny death then embrace it. Someone once said, "...There are only two guarantees in life: Death and Taxes." How true is this phrase? It is normally when we are faced with the imminence of dying or death that we only begin making plans or arrangements for our transition.
Having firsthand knowledge, it is very difficult to experience the physical death or passing of a loved one. It is even more taxing when you are subjected to last-minute funeral arrangements when physical death does occur.
To gain better insight in dealing with death, and to establish a better understanding of death altogether, I present the following:
I personally don't like the word "death" myself; so I prefer to call it "transition." While it is vital to focus on our living it is equally important to focus on our physical departure as well. We often view this passing as a permanent end to life. And, in all actuality, physical death after physical life is imminent. Like everything in nature, the cycle of physical life begins with physical birth and ends with physical death. Our earthly bodies are merely shells that provide housing to our living energy. Because energy is neither created, nor destroyed, it can only transform. So, in retrospect, physical death is the death of the physical being, but never the inner being, or soul. This is what I refer to as the "transition."
That being said, we now redirect our attention to our transition plans. I never quite realized the meticulous details that surround death's event. Funerals just don't "happen." They take planning, organization and a great deal of in-depth research and modus operandi. Just as painstakingly, we pre-arrange parties, receptions, births, and weddings. Of course, the aforementioned are much easier with which to deal. They are "living" and "vital" events, so we don't mind contending with them. But mention the word, "death," and suddenly, we shy away from it. We shelter ourselves from the reality of death as long as we can because we fear it.
Through my own experience, I've learned that the best way to deal with physical death is to embrace it. After all, it is a natural occurrence in human life. We cannot choose "Option C," when we only have options A and B. Below our some common excuses people use with regard to funerals:
- "But I'm not dying - why should I plan for death?"
- "I'm too young to worry about that kind of stuff..."
- "It won't be a big deal, I'm getting cremated anyway..."
- "I've got my whole life to live. Who cares about funerals now?"
- "Why should I worry about planning a funeral now? I need to focus on living instead..."
- "How can you even ask such a thing?"
Funeral Arrangements are an Individual Choice
Ask yourself the following Questions:
- What will you wear?
- Cemetary or Mausoleum?
- If you choose to be cremated, would you like your ashes placed in an urn or scattered?
- Church Services or Funeral Home Services?
- Do you wish to donate your body to those in need medically; scientific research, etc?
- Do you know what type of vault and casket you'd like?
- Do you prefer a viewing and/or funeral motorcade procession?
- Would you like someone to sing at your funeral?
- If you're an Armed Forces Veteran, do you wish to be buried in a National or local cemetery? Would you like full Veteran burial?
In addition to prepayment, the NFDA offers invaluable insight with their "Bill of Rights for Funeral Preplanning." See their guidelines below:
For more information on options and preplanning funerals, please visit the National Funeral Directors Association at www. nfda. org. If you would like to share your story or experience, we always welcome your insights.
© 2005 - All Rights ReservedDying? Not Me! Why you should plan for TransitionBy C. Bailey-Lloyd/LadyCamelot
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